In issue #15 of Elephant Mess, I introduced to my unsuspecting readers my "Elephant Mess World Tour & World Takeover" plan. If you are not familiar with it, I guess you will have to read it for yourself sometime because I don't feel like going into too much detail about it right now (contact me, if necessary). At that time (more than 2 years ago), I had only 10 states left in my quest to send an issue of Elephant Mess to all 50 states in the union. Now, I am down to only 5 states. I would like to use this space to list the 5 states that have not yet had the pleasure of receiving an issue of the disappointment of a zine and waste of precious paper, Elephant Mess, so that if anyone out there knows someone in one of these 5 states that would be willing to receive a copy of my boring read, I could then send a copy to them, thus fulfulling the first part of my mission to take over the world (with my zine). The five states are:
If you have friends, family or (preferably) know zinesters that live in any of these five states, please let me know what their address(es) is (are) so that I can get a copy of Elephant Mess off to them pronto. You are all stars in my book for helping me out with this. Now, stop reading this tripe and go do something useful with your life (that does not have anything to do with my zine).