"for the blood that's trapped in veins and the oxygen it claims"

-I will clean and organize my apartment.
-I will answer all my mail.
-I will finish planting my garden.
-I will listen to more punk rock.
-I will go skateboarding more often.
-I will become a master gardener.
-I will read more comic books and zines.
-I will also read more books.
-I will learn how to fall in love again.
-I will make more screenprints and blockprints.
-I will find time to play my guitar and write more punk songs.
-I will learn how to sew.
-I will work on my zines and distro.
-I will go on more long bike rides.
-I will go on more camping and fishing trips.
-I will live more simply.
-I will keep on fighting.

"I'm trying to find creative ways to keep my head out of the noose."
--J Church

"i don't feel and it feels great"

Baby Zine Library (Make It Grow)
Originally uploaded by juniperbug

I wasn't lying when I told you that my mom is not only super-awesome, but is also starting a zine library inside of the Mountain Home (Idaho) Public Library where she works. This picture shows the beginnings of it. She has a handful of other zines in her possession that need to be added, but she also needs donations...and lots of them. I hope that you understand the need for something like a zine library in a small, seemingly inconsequential Idahoan town like Mountain Home, and upon coming to such a realization are willing to donate your zine to such an endeavor. If I had come across such a thing as a youngster, I can only imagine the impact it would have had on me at such a young and impressionable age. Instead, I didn't make my first zine until I was an adult (legally, anyways).
If you have a zine to donate (please, please, please), send it to me and I will be sure that she gets it:
Dan Murphy
PO Box 3154
Moscow ID 83843

email me if you have any questions: messyelephant@hotmail.com

P.S. My mom loves reading zines, and I love my mom. So, don't deprive her of something she loves or I might have to hurt you.

"and all the lies and fears will stick to me like glue"

I think that I need more of this in my life:

BE THOU MY VISION (by Pedro the Lion)

"be thou my vision
oh lord of my heart
naught be all else to me
save that thou art
thou my best thought
by day or by night
waking or sleeping
thy presence my light
riches i need not
nor man's empty praise
thou my inheritance
now and always
thou and thou only
first in my heart
high king of heaven
my treasure thou art"

sorry, dude.

"i'm giving you a jar full of something awful"

juni 8
Originally uploaded by juniperbug.

As tradition would have it, I am slow at informing you about my new zine. Either way, The Juniper #8 is finished and ready to be mailed off to you (regardless of exorbitant postal charges). This issue is mostly about seeds: starting seeds indoors, purchasing seeds, seed activism, sprouting seeds. Also: car ownership and food poisoning. Send me a first class stamp, and I will send you a copy.
Dan Murphy, PO Box 3154, Moscow ID 83843

e(vil)mail: juniperjournal@hotmail.com

Some people are ingenious.

Why I Like These Plastic Cups as Planting Pots.
Originally uploaded by joeysplanting.

Oh, the possibilities. Different colored cups for different plants. Multiple options for mini-greenhouses. Inexpensive. Are polymers better than peat (environmetally speaking)? Salvage these materials to enhance your eco-savviness.
(click on the photo to find out where it's from.)

"our lives are just long saggings of the spine"

Yesterday, I went the whole day without turning on the TV in honor of TV Turnoff Week. It felt great. I noticed that I had much more time to do other things, like study for my chemistry test, listen to music, listen to NPR and college radio...plus I felt more motivated, and my convictions feel like they got a work-out. This is something that I should do more often. I definitely feel inspired to watch less TV. I really don't actually watch that much, but I tend to have it turned on a lot just to provide some white noise. Yesterday, I was reminded that there are better sources of white noise. More uplifting ones.
I listened to Doug Martsch's solo CD, and he taught me that maybe my "heart [is] too large for my sleeve," and that's probably why I keep it locked away and won't let anybody near it. And that's no way to live.

"there isn't a way of deciding
which half of life's less inviting
awake or a dream
'cause both of them lead you to suffer
you wake from one into the other
twice a day"
--Doug Martsch

"i don't know Billy Ocean, and i don't know the ocean floor"

I can't let this week go by without saying something about tv turnoff week (which surprisingly enough happens to be this week). It's an annual event supported by Adbusters Media Foundation during which people are encouraged to unplug themselves from their tv set for an entire week, or at the very least, greatly reduce their tv viewing for a week and practice responsible viewing habits. Surely there are things to be gained from such an event. Last year, this was not a problem for me because I did not have TV. This year it will prove more difficult because I have become addicted to watching the news and watching baseball games (especially Mariners baseball). Either way, I'm sure I could do without those things for a week, but I am not making any promises. I will make a pledge to reduce the amount of time I spend channel surfing and veg-ing though. I know that there is rarely anything on that's worth watching anyway. Resist the mental programming, smash your tv set on the punk rock.

(...)

"I have been told that my skin is exceptionally smooth, but what good is that when to get to my heart you have to crawl through long tunnels of sharp rock?" -The Microphones

"i'll apologize for the mess of my life for the rest of my life forever"

Happy Easter, my fellow geeks.

Last week was good because:
-I went to a punk rawk show with Misti. (Manville, no less.)
-I went skateboarding with Maaike. (Skate or die, dudes.)
-I went fishing with John. (I caught five, released three.)
Having friends is pretty cool, I guess.

Is there a male equivalent for the word, spinster? (I mean besides bachelor.) Either way, MALE SPINSTERS UNITE!

Three straight days of Mariners games being canceled due to snow in Cleveland = not cool.

"They said, 'Do you remember when you saw her last?'
I said, 'Her skin is cinnamon, her skin is cinnamon.'"
-The Long Winters

"i was never yours, and you were never mine, thank God it's spring time"

Yes, It's spring time. The weather is erratic right now, but soon it will be nice and warm for days on end. Today is opening day for the 2007 baseball season. Tomorrow is the Seattle Mariners' opening day. I'm starting some seeds indoors for my garden. There are scheduled greenhouse plantings coming up for the farm. I have started working on issue eight of the Juniper. I am skateboarding more and more. I guess this is an update of sorts, but what I'd really like to say right now is: Hey all you geriatric punk rockers! Get up and shake your fist! Smash your head on some punk rocks!

"that seven year itch became a lifelong twitch"

the skeleton of a silo
Originally uploaded by juniperbug.

"...and now I'm agoraphobic to the bone."

I wanted you to see this picture so that you would know what I meant when I said that the skyscrapers of Moscow, Idaho are coming down.

Also, I rediscovered the Challenger song, "Input the Output", today and it reminded me that, "Love? It's just an added expense..." It's also a great song to yell and break stuff to, so the image of a destroyed silo is fitting.

Now, if only I could focus on my Chemistry homework.

"spring time is war time, all eyes to the crime box"

Yesterday was the first day of spring, so here is a poem for you by Dylan Thomas:

Here In This Spring
Here in this spring, stars float along the void;
Here in this ornamental winter
Down pelts the naked weather;
This summer buries a spring bird.

Symbols are selected from the years'
Slow rounding of four seasons' coasts,
In autumn teach three seasons' fires
And four birds' notes.

I should tell summer from the trees, the worms
Tell, if at all, the winter's storms
Or the funeral of the sun;
I should learn spring by the cuckooing,
And the slug should teach me destruction.

A worm tells summer better than the clock,
The slug's a living calendar of days;
What shall it tell me if a timeless insect
Says the world wears away?

----

Also, this week marks the fourth anniversary of the war in Iraq. I can think of several things that are much greater causes for celebration than that. Either way, here's to another four years of imperialism and cultural hegemony and bowing down to the corrupted interests of oil tycoons and psychotic lobbyists. Sorry world.

"i feel like i wouldn't like me if i met me"

Just a few random things for you to read if you'd like:
-neko case is a heartbreaker.
-Am I always supposed to remember that time so long ago when I felt invincible up on that haystack? I guess so.
-The skyscrapers of Moscow, Idaho are coming down. This must be the beginning of the end.
-I like listening to mixes that other people make. They stay unfamiliar longer.
-Riding my bike through a hailstorm makes me feel powerful.
-I sing everything off-key, but at least I'm brave enough to try. I'm not afraid to dance either...as long as there aren't very many people watching.
-If someone taught a class on how to make friends, I would take it. If someone taught a class on how to be a better kisser, I wouldn't need it.
-Can people tell when I'm being sarcastic and when I'm not?

In other news: I think I'm going to start a new blog to document my farming and gardening this summer. Maybe that will help me write about it more often. I'll keep you posted.

"we can live another life, we can die another death, we can get born again"

i shouldn't be admitting this, but something's missing lately...
there is longing.
there is too much emptiness.

i want more of this stuff:

"hello, my name is on my shirt pocket
i'd rather not speak right now
i'm remembering something

most typically my dreams are dreadfully boring,
therefore i go to these places just to see the girls
with hair like hers
with clothes like she wore
with smells like hers
with handwriting like hers

you wrote me little letters
and you brought me lunch that time at my work
and that poem you left on my windshield wrapped in plastic
to protect it from the rain"
-grandaddy

also...

"when i held you close
i felt my mind explode
and at that point my whole life froze
we can't go back from here
the feeling's far from fear
it's over, take my hand, we'll disappear"
-dinosaur jr.

don't worry about me ... this too will pass.

"this elephant of years"

Elephant Mess #18
Originally uploaded by juniperbug.

I spent a little more than 3 months writing down my thoughts in journal form. I didn't write every day or even every week, and occasionally I didn't write much more than a sentence or two, but what I wrote was honest and reflected what I was feeling at the moment, although I may be over it by now. I collected all of these words together and called it Elephant Mess #18. I subtitled it: "the observations of a family geek" and later decided that it may have been more apropos if I had subtitled it something like: "the mental melodrama of an aging zinester" or "the hyperdrama of a superwonk." I suppose I could also call it "the clamor and pith of a misanthrope."
Either way, what's done is done, and it used to be just mine, but now it can be yours as well. All you have to do is send me a couple of stamps or a trade. If you send me $1, I will send you a pin as well...or I'll probably just end up throwing in pins with all of them until I run out. As always, send your best to:

Dan Murphy
PO Box 3154
Moscow ID 83843

messyelephant at hotmail dot com

"i clench my teeth, ignore my heart"

Several weeks ago I received a CD from a good friend of mine from Canada and was asked to review it. Since I don't typically do reviews in any of my zines, I decided that I would post a review here on my blog, which is something that I occasionally do. Francois is a longtime pen pal of mine and this is his latest music release:

G&F - Two Solitudes Standing
G is for Gary Flanagan, a solo artist and editor of Night Waves zine. F is for Francois Marceau of Leper Collective, Flesh for Frank and various other music projects as well as the former editor of Mastock zine. The disc is six tracks of electronic noise and distorted sound clips. Lots of interesting sounds permeate this disc, and they range from soothing to eerie to freakish or moving. The liner notes describe the music best, "various mangled, deeply processed insect sounds, noises, ambient, minimal samples." Also, "found sound, audio samples, voice, loops, noise, effects, guitar, [and] processed sound." It's very unique stuff, and is surely the product of countless hours of work. It's definitely worth a listen. If you'd like to order a copy, you can send $7 to:
Francois Marceau
7375 Louis-Hebert
Montreal, Quebec
H2E 2X5
Canada

Smash your head on the electronic rock.

"i'm of age but have no children"

Hey, if'n you liked that last site about green roofs, you should definitely check out this one.

"oh, i feel as scattered as grandmother's pearls"

I have been working on a new issue of Elephant Mess. It's almost finished ... or, it's closer to being finished than not. Hopefully you will have a copy of it in your hands before the month is over...or at least shortly thereafter, because surely it will take me several weeks to send them all out. I am telling you this because I thought it would be nice of me to keep you updated, and because I figured it was about time I posted something meaningful on here (although the meaningfulness of this post is debatable).
Since I'm not feeling overly wordy right at this moment, allow me to direct you to something that has me very excited lately: this.
Oh, and have you seen that recent documentary Jesus Camp? Crazy stuff.

"a cardigan and a frown"

If you don't start listening to Casiotone for the Painfully Alone right now, I will be very upset.

Also...you are required to dance around the room like a crazy person while listening.

&

PICT7146.JPG
Originally uploaded by wildcatfin.

The fact that I can blog other people's photos has not ceased to amaze me. (Especially since other people take much better photos than I do.)